A Long Hard Look...

State Introduces "Smog" License Plate for 2001

CARSON CITY--The Silver State has introduced a new license plate design that they claim accurately represents the region. The new plate, dubbed the "smog" plate, will replace the decade-old gray and off-white "goat" plate. "We thought the old plate was boring, so we introduced a new, glitz-and-glamour plate," said a design consultant for the DMV. "Plus I hear that the jail had a lot of bored prisoners and this gives them something to do besides watch TV. Even the police are in favor of the plate's bold and patented E-Z Read (TM) lettering. This makes their job a little bit less strenuous."

Critics claim that the new plate is even uglier than the unobtrusive "goat" plate which had a tendency to fade to a uniform gray color. Others wonder why the mountains are blue instead of the characteristic mauve of the Sierra Nevada range. Residents of the Las Vegas area are complaining that the plate looks nothing like their part of Nevada. "It doesn't light up and there aren't any landmarks like the Eiffel Tower, or the Luxor pyramid, or NY NY's Statue of Liberty. I mean, what's up with that?" said one Vegas man.

Still, Tarnish has analyzed the new plate design and found that it actually does accurately represent the geography of the region. The design capitalizes on Nevada's unpredictable weather, nuclear test history, and chronic inversion-induced haze. Personally, we think it is perfect.